WebJournal - The blog will set you free
News of no interest whatsoever except to very close and patient friends and family members and maybe people with no life


Sunday, August 31, 2003  

Yesterday we (as in Raul, Nicolas, Gemma, Nuria, Mirella and I) had dinner at a pretty good latin fusion restaurant (Yuca Bar Cocina Latina) in the East Village. The mojitos were good and the tapas, while a bit on the too nouvelle cuisine side, were delicious.
Second and last stop until 3 AM was at The Duplex in the village. The singer/bartender was really hot. I can't sing for my life, not even in the shower, but I do sing along when the music is loud enough and nobody can hear me.

It's a gorgeous Sunday morning now and I hope it stays gorgeous. I am waiting for M.A. so we can go downtown for dim sum (second try, at a different place). He is leaving tomorrow for a month and I am already in a state of despair.

11:57 AM
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Saturday, August 30, 2003  

Frankly, I am a judgmental bitch. A judgmental bitch with a sharp tongue who can be totally unaware of the impact my words have on other people.
I have this very strong fundamentalist side to me. In my world things tend to be either black or white - screw the grays.
But then there are those very humbling moments when I get to realize how badly my absurd harsh judgements can hurt people I love. And boy do I regret them.

7:51 PM
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Friday, August 29, 2003  

I have a problem with mirrors. Mainly, I hate them.
Just came down from dinner on the roofdeck with M.A., Pilar and Nicolas. Unfortunately a visit to the restroom was unavoidable. So was a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I feel suicidal now.

12:16 AM
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Thursday, August 28, 2003  

I am supposed to meet Johanny in Central Park in a few hours ... fat chance ...
It was pretty hectic today after work. I ran back home early to take a shower. I was supposed to meet Pilar at the Cabin Club at Pinetree Lodge� on 35th St. by 6.15.
M.A. rushed over at 6 PM, took a quick shower and off we went. Gemma, her two friends from Barcelona plus her sister and a friend of hers (visiting from Barcelona too and having been in NYC less than 6 hours) joined us, as well as Pilar and Nicolas and, a little later, Luis B.
I am not sure whether I liked the bar or not. The place is OK but the bartender is not a particularly friendly guy and he ran out of Merlot after two glasses - did not even have Cabernet to start with. After reading all the raving reviews I was expecting much better.
After a while my people started to get hungry and I took them to Waterfront Ale House on 2nd Ave. near the Kips Bay movie theaters. M.A. and I shared a rack of BBQ ribs and I covered them with "Sam's famous hot sauce". Absolutely finger-licking delicious. It was worth forgetting about being a vegetarian.
After dinner I proposed the Morgan's and there we landed until a short while ago.
Pilar just called me from home to tell me the scoop: the pathetic old guy who was at the bar with two girls doing a sad dance that looked more like convulsing and that she kept saying she knew from somewhere, is one of her neighbours. She just got home and saw him leave the building with one of the two girls. We suspected they were working girls and then M.A. confirmed that, when he had stepped out to have a smoke, the old guy had left Morgan's with the girls and had stopped outside to negotiate the terms of the deal. Given the time elapsed between that and when Pilar got home the guy is either a cheapo or he forgot his Viagra and that was really a very brief quickie. How depressing.

2:00 AM
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Wednesday, August 27, 2003  

Though awake I am not sure I am ready to get out of bed and catch a glimpse of Mars.

5:44 AM
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Tuesday, August 26, 2003  

Worked my butt off and had a wonderful time doing it but was more than ready for a happy hour. Went out with M.A. and we were joined later by Luis B. at Opal's. We had a bite to eat at the Divine's . I kept staring at the bartender's tatoo and it really made me want to get one.
Anyways, it's still Summer and most Newyorkers are out of town so by the time we were ready to go back to the Opal for some dancing there was nobody left to dance with. And M.A. announced he wanted to go home. Big bummer. If he is in no mood to party we are in trouble. As the Italians say "Non c' � pi� religione" ("There is no religion anymore"). So now I know there is no Hell, no Heaven and that M.A. might just call it a night and leave early.
So that's why I am home now, watching Charlie Rose's interview of Annie Lennox. I will alway remember her Sisters are doing it for themselves video with Aretha Franklyn. If I am ever ready to turn my back on the guys and focus on the ladies she will be the first one in line. She is so damn interesting.
I will still be working my butt off tomorrow but the job awaiting me is challenging and fun so I am actually looking forward to it.

11:53 PM
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My reputation is shot. Tonight I was the first to leave, albeit I managed to take a couple of people with me. But then again, this was the evening I was going to stay home, rest and detox. Yeah, sure. As the Oscar Wilde's saying goes: I can resist everything but temptation. So I went out with a whole bunch of people (for the record: Nicolas, Gemma and her two friends from Barcelona, Monica, Luis B. and the other Luis) to celebrate the Luises day (it is some sort of Saint Louis today). The details tomorrow. For now just a brief note reminding myself in a most public way what a complete idiot I am. I am swamped with work (I was asked to work this week-end again) and I should be at the office as early as possible tomorrow, and yet ... it's almost 2 AM and I am blogging away, wide awake!

1:45 AM
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Monday, August 25, 2003  

God, I love this city! Yesterday was a gorgeous and busy day. Unfortunately the kind of crispy beautiful weather that I now associate with 9/11. It is a lousy association, I know, but it's pretty vivid.
I woke up on Sunday after just an hour and a half of sleep, courtesy of the can of Coke I had on Saturday night, and eventually dragged myself to the office. I did not stay long but the few hours I was there were very productive so it was OK when, at around 2.15 PM I left with Pilar - who was working too - to go meet M.A. on Broadway and Canal and find a Dim Sum place in Chinatown. Bummer was that by the time we found one it was too late and we could only eat a few dishes before being told it was over and our only option was to order from the menu. That pissed me off and totally ruined my appetite.
After lunch we walked a bit around SoHo and then cabbied up to Central Park. The Sheep Meadow was packed, hundreds of people playing frisbee, a very strange guy doing his own revved up version of tai chi and a funny unpolished routine with a glistening sword, a couple of extremely non athletic girls with huge breasts and no bra trying to catch a ball, the usual.
At about 7 PM we went to the Boathouse bar for a drink and stayed there until probably 9. At the beginning we were standing by the bar but then we found a table by a tree (and a few mice running around) and later on another table by the lake. We just hung out there, enjoying the beautiful place, the boats, the bogus gondoliers, the people and going on and on about how magnificent NYC is and how thrilling it is to live here. Curiously, for such a large city, I recognized the black guy who recently had his hands all over me at the Red Lion downtown. What were the chances? There was also a gorgeous woman, on the not so young anymore side, with the most striking eyes and eye make-up. She left before I could take a picture of her though.
By 9 Pilar and I were getting hungry. On our way out of the Park we bumped into a small group of Haitians playing drums and having their own little party. They were not a sophisticated bunch, actually they were downright seedy, but they were having fun and I could not resist and had to dance a bit with one of them, a black tall thin fellow called Cliff. After my daily grinding session we finally exited the Park and went to this Greek place on 9th Avenue for some delicious finger food. I was home by midnight, just like Cinderella. Unfortunately I kicked my iBook off the bed in the middle of the night and killed the CD tray. Will have to take care of that later.

6:37 AM
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Sunday, August 24, 2003  

It's almost 5 AM and I am still wide awake. I had a regular Coke tonight and this is what happens when you are not used to caffeine.

I'll be a very lonely soul in September: M.A. won't be here, Pilar won't be here, Monse won't be here, Pam won't be here ... I'll probably spend most of my time at the gym, which isn't such a bad option anyhow ... and yet ...

4:44 AM
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Just uploaded a few pics from the Great Blackout of 2003.

12:58 AM
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Saturday, August 23, 2003  


Scary how appropiate this cartoon is. hugh macleod, you are a genius!


10:58 PM
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I did lay out on the roofdeck for about 45 minutes today. It was gorgeous. Sunny, breezy, perfect. I had my iBook with me and wanted to get some work done but the sun made it impossible to see the display so, much to my chagrin, I had to veg out.
No barhopping tonight but a pleasant evening at home nonetheless: Japanese food delivery, City Confidential, America's Most Wanted and probably some scary movie on HBO later.
I am looking out the window to the neighbors with the great terrace: they are having a party. The terrace looks like a restaurant, great lightening, candles, balloons, they did such a remarkable job I feel like given them a standing ovation.
I'm going to the office again tomorrow and I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that the computer did not crash or hang and that it finished indexing the documents that need be indexed by Monday.
I'll try to get there early so I can leave early and go to Chinatown with M.A. and Pilar for dim sum. The weather report is announcing another beautiful day tomorrow. Maybe I could get to the office very very early and come home for a little time on the roof before going downtown.

9:44 PM
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Hallelujah! We finally went out yesterday!!! We managed to break the spell! M.A. came by after the gym and we went straight downtown, had a very light dinner that would not weight us down for the rest of the evening and then proceeded to bar hop untill 4 AM. Places were not too busy but at least there were people around us, and there was music and we could dance a bit. I was really missing the shout-over-loud-music conversations. Today I can proudly say I have the familiar morning-after hoarse voice and my purse is all stained with a streaky mess of left-over cocktails. I feel reborn and I can't wait to do it again.
I am at the office now, taking care of a database but if the sun is still shining I'm going to my roofdeck in a couple of hours.

2:41 PM
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Friday, August 22, 2003  

It's that T.O.M. again and I am completely drained. I slept on and off the whole day, except for a brief visit to the dentist (I have to go back on Monday) with a stop at the drugstore and then at the bookstore. I was so dizzy I could not look at anything on the bottom shelves. I feel much better now. While I am bummed that I took the day off for nothing, it was a good thing because I could never have worked today anyways. Monse on the contrary was at the office by 9.30. In am in awe.

Bits of a conversation I had with Raul yesterday are now popping into my mind. He's been to Congo recently visiting some peacekeeping troops and was telling me about the experience and about having the camp attacked in the middle of the day. Bullets flying around and that sort of thing. Movies stuff, except that some people have to live with that everyday.

I can't believe it but I am sleepy again ...

1:12 AM
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Thursday, August 21, 2003  

So little time to blog ...

Yesterday, Wednesday, a group of us (Monse, M.A., Chema, Fabian and Raul) had dinner at home and played Cranium until 5 or 6 in the morning. M.A. had spent the afternoon shopping and showed up with a set of margarita plastic glasses that we can use on the roof and a "margarita kit" which included a cd with margarita music and, most importantly, a booklet of cocktails' recipes that should keep me busy until he comes back to NY. I am a sucker for presents and the man sure has an eye for picking them.
As for Cranium, I had a blast playing the game. I had never played it before but I usually love games and this was no exception. It is side-splitting funny to watch people trying to convey concepts with a sorry piece of paper or painfully trying to whistle a tune they probably don't even know.

Damn! I am running late for my dentist's appointment!!! So, lets paste the posting for the last couple of days ...

Monday was a beautiful day that had to be enjoyed on a terrace so we went for a drink at the Sutton Bar and then we had dinner at The Divine Bar on the West Side, where we were joined by Pilar's friends. I really like them. Especially the guy. Or maybe especially the girl. Probably both, in different ways.

Tuesday I woke up to CNN's story on the bombing of the UN headquarters in Bagdad. It is a very strange experience to see the organization you work for in the news for all the wrong reasons, the familiar blue flag engulfed in smoke and to hear that somebody you never met but whose words you translated a hundred times is dead. The poor man. If you have to die in such a violent way you'd better go with the blast, not lay in agony under a pile of rubble for hours. And the poor families. It must be hell for them.
After work I managed to squeeze in a quick pedicure before meeting M.A. for a drink and then joining Gemma and two friends of hers at Monse's. The friends were nice kids but basically kids, with not a lot to say. I tried to pick up a couple of friendly fights just to spice things up but they were not willing to go there. Yawn yawn. Dinner was at some place in the Village. The food was great, the restrooms were beautiful, the waitress spoke perfect Spanish (she had lived in Spain for a year). At the end we were grossly overcharged and M.A. spent a good 15 minutes trying to explain the situation to her in a very animated way. I don't think she ever got it. It was like they were people from two different planets, speaking two different languages. After dinner we had a drink at a place ominously called Rhone. The place looked very hip but it was almost empty and the music sucked. Like elevator versions of good songs. I should have known better than agreeing to go to a French bar.
On my way back I started a cell phone conversation with Pam that continued from my land phone at home untill I almost fell asleep with the earpiece attached to my ear.

12:38 AM
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Wednesday, August 20, 2003  

I am a very shallow person. I'd better come to terms with this pitiful reality. People to me are either fun or boring. Boring people I get rid of very fast. Fun people I love and worship. I agree that there might be better ways of classifying human beings but the truth is that instead of growing more tolerant I am getting much worse with age. My life is a frantic escape from boredom. Something or somebody bores me, I hit delete. I don't have time nor patience for complexity. Try to overanalyze life with me and I am gone. In my world only a few things are worth worrying about and I really mean only a few. Most things are either there to be enjoyed or ignored. I'd much rather conserve my energy for the very few things that can't be avoided, ignored or denied. At least when shit comes my way I am not exhausted by stupid little garden variety petty daily problems, also known as life.

I'll publish my post for the last few days this evening.

4:21 PM
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Monday, August 18, 2003  

It started pouring at the very moment I was reaching for the door. So much for a tan.
Today was another magnificent day until I decided it would be a good idea to go to a terrace after work. As soon as I said it the sky started quickly filling up with clouds. Maybe I should lease out this power of mine. They might need it in drought affected countries.

4:51 PM
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Sunday, August 17, 2003  

Now I can say "I was there" for the "great blackout of 2003", as it is now called, and it has been a lot of fun.

Thursday, after the lights flicked and the computers went off, I finally got my chance to perform my duties as deputy fire warden at the office. Unfortunately there were less then glamourous and all I had to do was call the fire unit and find out what was going on, before relaying it to my colleagues. Not very exciting and I did not even get to mingle with a real firefighter. Rumors were running amock already. We already knew there was a power failure all over Manhattan, then we heard it was extending over to Canada. Eventually security told us we there was a major power outtage and that we could go home. Down the stairs we went, not a big deal in our case - our offices are on the 13th floor. There was a jittery feeling in the air because nobody was really sure what was going on. Being the adrenaline junkie that I am, it was kind of exciting to me and I was enjoying it. Once out on the street I was engulfed in a sea of people, walking in all directions, so different from 9/11 when everybody was walking North. People were standing in line at the local delis to get the essential which to normal folks means batteries, candles and water. We are not normal. M.A. went to get ice, I went to get wine. Now we could face whatever was in store. A few flights of stairs up and we were home. I had plenty at candles, plenty of food, some water, I even found a couple of batteries and a walkman radio. We were all set. The margaritas had to be on the rocks, not frozen, but other than that it was perfect. Monse came a while later, after a concert in Central Park that did not need to be cancelled thanks to the fact that the band had a power generator. We stayed up until 3 or so in the morning, looking onto dark streets and dark buildings, except for the candles burning in some apartments and on the surrounding terraces and counting our blessing that we did not get stuck in a elevator nor did we need any kind of machine to keep us alive. At 3 we finally settle for the night, hoping in our heart of hearts not to get the lights back too soon so we could keep enjoying the school's out feeling. So cool.

On Friday morning, we woke up early and the electricity was not back. Yupee! But then we noticed we did not have water either and that sucked. We did have some bottles of drinking water around and half a bag of ice, enough to take cat baths before going out and spending the most gorgeous day since the beginning of the summer in Central Park. We chose a cool spot in the Sheep Meadow, under tree shadows and near a sprinkler so M.A. could reclaim his inner child and splash around. Monse and I just layed there in the shadow where I still I managed to get a sunburn. Later on we were joined by Pilar and two friends of hers visiting from Madrid and then, for lunch, by Monica. We booked a table at the Boathouse but there was at least and hour and a half wait, so we ended at walking to this great Italian restaurant with the nicest waiter/owner, a nice-looking huge Italian guy who managed to keep the most friendly grin on his face and a cheerful attitude despite less than ideal conditions.
After lunch Pilar, Monse, Monica and Pilar's friends went sightseeing on the Upper West. M.A. and I walked to his video club to get some tapes and the back to our own respective places. By the time I got home the water was back, though I had to wait until Saturday morning to get hot water.

Saturday afternoon I spent it with Melissa and was almost doubled over with laughter when she told me of her best friend liking her former boyfriend. In her words: "She cannot live without a man" . Mind you, Melissa turned 13 last week and the man in question is all of 12 years old!
Later in the afternoon M.A. came over to cook while I kept busy cutting wires in my mouth after a small braces disaster that I will have to have corrected next week.
Monse, Nicolas and Daniel showed up for dinner a little later. The plan was to meet Johanny and Pascal downtown and do some bars and finally some dancing but it never happened. Nicolas and Daniel leaft early but Monse went home at 5 AM. M.A. left this morning, after crashing on the AeroBed. We better get out of this staying at home pattern or I'll start screaming!
It is sunny now and I am going to the roofdeck to perfect the tan before watching the videotapes.

4:00 PM
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Wednesday, August 13, 2003  

Got them back!

4:28 PM
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I should not play around with my blog before 7 AM! Now I can't get back my archives links!!!! And I can't spend any time on it. Johanny is waiting for me at the gym. Shit.

6:47 AM
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6:27 AM
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He read my mind! Today I stayed late at the office and was getting bummed. I was thinking about cancelling my appointment with Johanny and going out for a drink and just relaxing. I asked Pilar but she was not available. I was going to ask M.A. but he was out of the door before I could do it. Thanks God I did cancel my training session anyways because a short while after getting home he rang me up from downstairs. Chit chat, a salad, good wine and a clear understanding we should not stay home too long or too often but rather go out and discover new loud busy places. I could not agree more. Time to get some sleep now. Good night!

12:45 AM
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Monday, August 11, 2003  

Short update:

Yesterday, Sunday, the tea party over at Elizabeth's turned into a food orgy that ended late into the evening. The food was scrumptious, the company was odd. There was this monkey-looking girl, sort of a woman-child, tiny, wearing a very short summer dress, like a short short slip, and no make-up. She was very prissy and it was instant dislike on my part - probably on hers too, but I didn't ask. She studied microbiology but works in some kind of corporate environment that she hates for "moral" reasons, something to do with being incensed at how much the big honchos make. She is looking for a job in a non-profit organization and of course she can get her news only from the BBC. Exactly the kind of person that can almost make me side with O'Reilly and Fox TV. Thank goodness the rest of the guests were friends. It was a very warm and humid night and instead of taking to bus back to Manhattan (we were in NJ) we took the ferry. Manhattan's skyline, the breeze, the water, the silence: absolutely lovely.

Just hanged up with JP. He called to tell me one of his closest friends has died. He had cancer and had a pretty bad downturn yesterday. Although the end was expected we never thought it was going to be this fast. The saddest thing is that he leaves behind two small children. JP is in Montevideo and was going to the hospital now. Too bad I can't be with him.

11:13 PM
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Sunday, August 10, 2003  

Where have the all the links to my archive pages gone????? I will have to figure it out tomorrow, as I am now too tired to even look into it.
Yesterday we all stayed at Monse's. I was the lucky one who got to sleep on her bed, but the others kept the fan. I slept just a few hours and then had something to eat with Pilar before coming home in the early afternoon. This evening is was a girls only dinner at Maite's. Just got back and I am exhausted.

3:09 AM
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Saturday, August 09, 2003  

Here we are at it again. It's past 6 AM and there goes induction. Actually, it's not that bad and it�s premeditated, but I had very little food and about 6 whiskies. I am at Monse's exercising my right to blog everybody into sheer panic. I am hearing all kinds of "don�t write this" or "don�t write that" and I am having the time of my life. I have the power and I enjoy it. The gang is sprawled on the coach and the floor. I am fine, of course, but then I fell asleep for a while a few hours ago. Pilar is trying to get us to go to the river but nobody�s buying it. We shall see ...

6:25 AM
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Thursday, August 07, 2003  

Might have been the crappy weather, or the protein overload or good ol' PMS but today, after hitting the gym early in the morning, I was too tired to do anything else. I called in sick at the office, first for only half a day and then, after soaking in a long hot bath and feeling even more tired, for the whole day. I slept on and off. Tomorrow I should feel like the Energizer bunny, unless the PMS situation worsens. Guys have no idea how lucky they are. They do not bloat up like baloons, get zits right in the middle of the face, feel like crawling into a corner and weeping for no reason. I will so welcome menopause!

I am now converting some of my Tony Robbins' programs into MP3 so I can copy them to my iPod.

Daniel sent me this, and is so sadly appropiate ...

And the Forecast Is . . .
By MICHAEL RUBINER

Wednesday in New York : Rain. Heavy at times. Followed by periods of
precipitation.

Thursday : Lingering showers throughout the day. Chance of rain 800
percent.

Friday : Moist. Damp. Sodden.

Saturday : Rainish. Showery. Precipitacious.

Sunday : Light rain followed by heavy rain followed by pouring.

Monday : Unseasonably rainy in the morning. Uncharitably rainy in the
afternoon. Unconscionably rainy in the evening.

Tuesday : Endless showers broken up by occasional flooding.

Wednesday : Remember "Waterworld"? Like that, only with more rain.

Thursday : Not sunny. The opposite of sunny. Just forget about sunny,
O.K.?

Friday : Clearing just long enough for you to make weekend plans. Followed
by obscene amounts of rain.

Saturday : Take a wild guess.

Sunday : Incessant, spirit-crushing rain. The kind of rain that makes it
futile to get out of bed in the morning. The kind of rain that seems as if
it will never end. And guess what? It never will. Ever. Do you understand?

Monday : Please go away.

Tuesday : Ample, brilliant sunshine throughout the day. Wait - did I say
sunshine? I meant rain. Really hard rain.


11:03 PM
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Wednesday, August 06, 2003  

Yesterday at the gym there was this guy on the treadmill with the worst varicose veins I've ever seen. They covered the whole length of both his legs. He was wearing shorts. I remember feeling something close to admiration for his unselfconsciousness. This morning he was there again, a few treadmills from mine. Johanny told me he used to be around 400 pounds, which would explain his legs. He is now quite trim and seems to be in great shape. Way to go. Johanny was telling me also about a new client, also in the almost 400sh pounds range who he met yesterday. We were talking about how intimidating a gym can be for somebody that big. How the whole concept of a gym as a place to work out can get lost in the idea of a gym as a place to strut your stuff. Fortunately I've been around health clubs so long I am not intimidated at all, but then again I know that no matter what I look like I can outperform quite a few of the people around me and that gives me confidence. Once, in Montevideo, I went for an advanced aerobic class only to be told by another client that the class was probably going to be too advanced for me. It was with a sense of deep satisfaction that I jumped and danced him into a whole. But what if I had not been up to it? What kind of welcome was that? What a jerk! In all honesty I must say I never got that kind of crap from an instructor. Most, just like Johanny, really like their jobs and know what it is all about.

Tonight I decided to stay home, in spite of the fact that the clique is out having fun. I really want to stay off the booze for a couple of weeks, and the combination of no booze plus probably no decent food plus probably no dancing was enough to keep me home. I almost went to a funk class over at Crunch instead but the headache I have had since this morning would not have benefitted from the pounding. So I just stayed home. Did nothing of the things I should have done (pay bills, for instance), of course.

Well, Arnie is on for Governor of California. He will be on Jay Leno in a couple of minutes.

11:09 PM
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Tuesday, August 05, 2003  

I can't decide whether I mildly enjoy Chistopher Hitchens or he bores me to tears. Years ago, when I first read an article he wrote on Mother Theresa for Vanity Fair I loved him, probably because he confirmed all the things I suspected about the ol' cow. But then I read other pieces by him and the magic was gone. Mostly I see him now like a very pretentious and unoriginal provocateur. His latest article? Predictably, on Bob Hope. By the way, it seems I have decided: he bores me.

9:50 PM
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I am sick and tired of this godawful weather. It's hot and sticky and now and then, mostly when I need to be outdoors, it rains cats and dogs, a steady curtain of fat drops that comes and goes like it's the Tropics. My hair is a mess, my make-up melts, my nose sweats, I am a pasty shade of white. Yuk. I hate it.

Why on earth am I watching Steel Magnolias on HBO? The funeral scene is playing now and here I am weeping and laughing and hating being so easily manipulated.
I have half a dozen phone calls to make and work to do but I will probably just have a shake and watch a movie (possibly not a tearjerker). These detox days are a welcomed change, but I've already found a low carb Margarita mix ...

8:44 PM
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Yesterday my upstairs neighbour called me to meet a girl I exhanged a few e-mails with. She is interested in working at the U.N. and wanted to know about the competitive examination and how it works. We had a little chat but I was home before 8 PM and asleep before midnight. This morning I met - late - Johanny for a short lower-body workout. I am clearly a sleep camel. Now it's time to get to work, if I manage to turn off the TV and the trashy daytime talk show I am watching.

9:20 AM
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Sunday, August 03, 2003  

Very calm, pleasant evening. M.A., Pilar and Monse came over for dinner. Monse, just back from her weeklong yoga retreat, was not ready to ruin all that purification with non vegetarian food and alcohol. M.A. and I were not feeling too good, so that left Pilar globbling down everything. I am so proud of us. We will start the week in a most healthy way.
I am now watching Chris Rock's Bigger and Blacker on HBO.

11:10 PM
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Saturday, August 02, 2003  

I did not call Melissa. I did not go out at all. It was past 4 PM when I finally got out of bed, took a shower, put on make-up and practically got in bed again. Breakfast/lunch/dinner was at 7 PM. I loaded on the carbs, pizza and pasta. I am even having a beer now but, just as yesterday, I am not really in the mood for drinking. I wish I was though. I am going on Atkin's on Monday.
I purchased some music from tha Apple on-line store. Plenty of Nelly, some Lyle Lovett, a few old Tempations and even an ancient Pete Seeger song.

I might go to the office tomorrow to test drive a new software. Then again, I might not.

9:01 PM
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Yesterday after work Pilar, M.A., Francia and I went to the Divine Bar, then the Mica Bar and finally Nessa. Way too mellow for me. It's summertime in NYC, everybody seems to be somewhere else. The bars are empty, except for the Opal and its usual line to get in, but then Pilar and Francia do not like crowded places. I do not like empty places. M.A. doesn't care one way or the other. I was not hungry, I did not feel like drinking - not that I did not end up getting plenty done. Empty bars are not conducive to dancing and after a while I was not even in the mood for it. At the Mica I looked around and looked around to see if there was anybody I could latch onto but all I could see were a few tourists in shorts and baseball caps. Not a soul that looked interesting to me. At the Divine Bar I even saw a child. I should have known it then that it was not going to be my kind of evening. At Nessa there was hardly anybody. Not a big deal as the patrons at that bar are usually barely alive, but still ...
I should have left when I started getting seriously bored and saved everybody the sight of my brooding face. I hate it when I get bored and I hate who I become when I get bored. It's probably time to lay low for a while and wait the summer out. Maybe I should start getting to the gym in the evening. At least I could take the hip-hop classes. I could also go back to taking classes at the Broadway Dance Center. In any case, I need a change.

Today's Saturday and after calling my mother I will make some plans with Melissa. Tonight I definetely want to stay home, order food in, watch TV.

12:16 PM
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